handshake or fist bump?

so this guy i know saw me in passing and as we got closer to each other, he held his hand out to shake my hand. i, instead, offered him a fist. he stopped dead in his tracks and says, "i don't want none of that! you shake my hand like a man! we're better than that, aren't we?"
okay, yeah we cool but...there are some nasty people out there that don't wash their hands. i mean let's keep it real. we've all been in a public restroom where we have witness somebody that has walked right out the door after taking a crap without washing their hands. and what did they do? they grabbed the door handle! so now there are doo doo germs all over the door handle. so how am i gonna get out the door after washing my hands without getting doo doo germs on my hands? i wash my hands, dry my hands with a paper towel (automatic dispense preferred), turn off the water with the paper towel, and open the door with that same paper towel. ya'll can call me a germaphobe if you want. if you touch that door handle after washing your hands, your hands ain't as clean as you think they are! anyway, back to my point, it was nothing against him, but i don't know how many other people he shook hands with, so on and so forth. so as far as i'm concerned, everybody can get a fist bump from me.

Dom
if nobody feels you, i feels you, feels me?
be easy coz life is hard...